Like I said in my last entry, I'm overhauling my diet and exercise. Last week, I did three days of back to back classes at Hotbox and it was seriously the best I've felt in months. I was full of energy, I slept well..and I never sleep well. There was some soreness, but nothing I couldn't handle. Eric (my Muay Thai coach) always told me that your body does what you tell it to do, it's all in your head. I also started my new job on Monday. So far, it's great. Nothing too stressful. I haven't gotten to see any kids yet, mostly because I haven't been cleared by the company. I got to spend the weekend with my best friend and we have both decided to follow a vegan diet as a detox for the month of March. I'm super excited because I've wanted to go vegan for a while, but never had enough motivation.
I'm the happiest I've been in a long time, since I moved to Nashville. I have time and I'm incredibly motivated to get my body into shape. During my visit to Terri, we bought new running shoes and planned out the detox. I know i can do this. Having a job I enjoy, time to get me into a better place, the support of my HotBox folks and my friends, I know I can do it.
I hope that this diet change and more time for the gym brings more than just a better body, I know that there's more to a better life than that. I hope that I love myself. I don't. I know that I'm a good person and I have a lot to offer, but I don't believe it fully. I don't have confidence, I'm afraid to speak up, engage people in conversation, I dress in black to hide. I don't like people to hug me because I don't want them to feel my body. I feel hypocritical because I help kids feel good about themselves, and I don't believe a single word. If I want to have healthy relationships with people, I need to change that. So here we go. I have the best people backing me up.
Here's my before photo: