Based in louisville, kentucky, "hi my name is amos", is a blog and youtube channel about mental health, body image, and managing life. 

I may be old, but at least I'm not like all those other old guys...

So Thursday I turned 31. Not a monumental birthday by any means, but one that hit me a little harder than I thought it would. Thursday  came. It was any other normal day, I went to the gym that morning... They did sing "Happy Birthday" at the end of the round. I went to work, which wasn't the most awesome of days. I got a couple cards from some of my boys, which was really sweet. I went to yoga, and I got to suggest a few songs for the playlist. I think I was expecting it to hurt or something.  All in all, a good way to spend the day turning 31. One of the greatest things about life as I've gotten older is that I have the greatest community of friends, ever. Friday I woke up with a migraine. I felt awful. I slept all day. Friday night was my birthday dinner with friends. I couldn't eat. I just sat in the corner, quiet. My friends could all laugh and chat together, many of which had never met each other before. It really warmed my heart to see everyone there together, that I love and care about, being able to hang out. photo 3-1

Saturday, when I was finally able to be human, my BFF and I went to Red Bicycle (in Germantown) for crepes. The first meal I had eaten in 36 hours is pictured above, a Funky Monkey. Chocolate, Peanut Butter, Walnuts, and Bananas. That spells H-A-P-P-Y B-I-R-T-H-D-A-Y. 2-2

Five. Iron. Frenzy. One of my favorite bands from when I was a teenager. Who broke up on my 21st birthday and reunite on my 31st. It was a perfect way to celebrate.

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There has always been something amazing about FIF. Yeah, they had some corny songs. They talked about some pretty risky stuff, for the scene they were in. I could relate to a lot of songs, as I was coming into my own faith and not my parents. They still do. I had several, "Oh you see that too" moments, while listening to the new album. Some 15 years after I started listening to the band, they still get 'me'.

I always say that each year is going to be "different". Like the year prior has been this hell-hole of a year and the next is my come back. The next year, turns out strangely like the last. This year, I did something different. I got accountability. I let a few friends in on my goals for the year, so they can check in. I decided that I'm not going to hate my body or my situation in life. I get texts from friends about how I inspire them to get to the gym and eat right, and I play it off. Yes, I have hung on to a plateau for quite a while. Maybe because I'm scared a bit of the free fall to the next stop. I'm really 13 inside this 31 year old, sometimes.

This weekend really made me look at my life and be thankful that I am who I am today. I am not who I thought I would be at 31. I'm happy though. I'm working in a career I love, and some major changes are in the making. I have the GREATEST friends anyone can ask for. My family loves me. I'm getting healthy. I live in a city that has a lot to offer me. What's to be depressed about? I see the changes that need to be made, so time to put my big girl panties on and make those changes.

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Here's Amos then (i'm not the one in the bonnet), and here's Amos now.

Here's to another year and new adventures.

Out With The Old

Another Damn Cot-An Exercise in Reframing.